Distracted

I pulled in behind a large SUV and got out my member and debit cards to be ready for my turn to pump gas. Nothing was happening at the pump in front of me, so I assumed the person might have finished and would be leaving soon. I waited patiently a couple more minutes, and it dawned on me that the driver had not even begun to do what they had supposedly come there to do, to pump gas. A minute or so later, the person got out, and with […]

Parenting Character

Successful parenting starts with you, the parent. Your character, who you are deep inside determines what you value most and how you will live. Character also determines the kind of parent you will be. So, who are you? What values are at the core of your being? Are you kind and gentle? Selfish, arrogant or prideful? Are you a know-it-all or are you open to learning new ways of thinking and doing things? Most importantly, does your character resemble God’s view of who he is capable of making you? God […]

Where Does Successful Parenting Start?

Where does successful parenting Start? Does it begin at the birth of a child? Having a child makes you a parent but does it make you a successful one? Does it begin with reading books on child development or parenting strategies or techniques? While this can prove helpful, good parenting must begin somewhere else. Then, where does successful parenting begin? It begins with the person you see in the mirror. That’s right. Good parenting begins with the person you are. Who you are, your character, is the most important issue […]

Truth and Trust

An important factor in building trust in your marriage or other relationships is being truthful about ordinary, everyday things in life. Mary Ann asks John, “Did you make the bank deposit today?” John hesitates for a moment but responds from the other room in an irritable tone, “Yes, Mary Ann, I made the deposit.” Opening the site to their bank account he negotiates the on-line transaction. Why did John choose to lie instead of saying something like, “No, but thanks for reminding me, I’ll do that right now?” There are […]

Are You Too Trusting?

Are you too trusting? In the previous blog I dealt with the issue of transference and how our difficult experiences in the past can cause trust problems in our present relationships. There is a “flip side” to transference related to trusting people which we also need to be aware of because that can cause tremendous heartache also. Let’s say you grew up in a family where you could absolutely trust the word and character of your parents. And, for argument’s sake, let’s say that you would admit to being too trusting […]

The Trust Factor: Marriage (part one)

Trust is vital in marriage. I recently heard of a situation where a young wife had discovered her husband was having an affair. When she confronted him about his unfaithfulness and the marriage vows he took he replied, “That’s just a piece of paper.” The “piece of paper” he was referencing was, of course, the marriage license. There are several things wrong with a scenario like this. First, adultery is wrong. It is a breach of trust between a man and a woman who have agreed to be faithful to […]

How Cute Is Your Kid?

Appearance is a big deal in our superficial society. To be cute or handsome is “good” and to not be”blessed” with good looks is not so good. The word “cute” ranks in the top 20% of words in use today. We have been so indoctrinated by this value system that we tend to see people differently based on their physical attractiveness. Do you believe your kid’s true worth should be measured by how he or she registers on the “attractive” scale?  I certainly hope not. A parent with this type of […]